To start off this post, I want to thank all of you who have been tuning in daily or weekly. I can’t believe I’ve tackled twenty-two songs already and only have eight left. So far, I’ve tallied 534 total views of this series, and I couldn’t be happier. Here’s hoping I’ll finish this off well.
Also, if you’d like to follow along with the collective playlist of this series, feel free to do so here. I update it daily so it stays up-to-date with the series. And if you like what you see and here, I’d implore you to share – it would mean the world to me!
Okay, enough of the sappy breaking the fourth wall. Onto other, equally sappy things.
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Everybody has a breaking point. Sometimes it depends on how short or long-tempered you are. But there’s something for every person that makes them snap. For me, it’s when someone messes with my friends. I will go to war for my friends, and if someone hurts them, sometimes I’m angrier than they are.
And my friends are like that for me too. I have a tribe of amazing friends. I’ve lived with two of them for the last two years, and we are so close that we call each other the Merry Wives, and joke that each other’s significant others are merely sidepieces. Anna and Hannah are extremely precious to me. Some of my friends live across the state but we still keep in touch no matter what (looking at you, Meredith and Matt.) These friendships have stood the test of time, trials, and tribulations. And I couldn’t be more thankful.
If you love someone, or multiple people (which you probably do,) you probably know a lot about them. You know their strengths. You know their weaknesses. You know all their embarrassing stories (or maybe most of them.) My friends were the people who held me throught my darkest times, and lifted me out of some deep, dire places. But they also rejoiced with me when things were good, if not great. They are truly my “rock” friends, who may change as the years go on, but do not move from where they’re planted in my life.
If I didn’t know much about my friends, I probably couldn’t call them my friends. I don’t know if I would actually love them, because they’d be virtual strangers. The recipe for a good friendship, and relationship in general, is time, commitment, and patience. Time to spend with them, a promise to commit to getting to know them, and the patience to watch them grow and grow with them. Whether it’s a marriage or a friendship, it rings true.
It also doesn’t hurt to know their breaking point.
Day Twenty-Two: Porcelain – Emarosa
I was introduced to the band Emarosa by someone I don’t like that much anymore. Actually, someone I don’t like at all. The first song he shared with me was “I’ll Just Wait,” which was actually a perfect summation of my relationship with him. He was obsessed with that band, specifically Jonny Craig, the former frontman of Emarosa. The band is now helmed by Bradley Walden, who has given Emarosa a gentler touch (did I mention my ex was a metalhead? Yeah, I don’t know what 19-year-old Audrey was doing, either.)
The first time I heard “Porcelain,” I still loved this person. But ironically, he broke me not long after. And that’s essentially what this song is about.
In the same way I can imagine you a mother
I can imagine you are wild
Raising our beauty queen
In the same way I can imagine you my wife
I can imagine you are wild
The happiest part of me
Walden’s falsetto is heartbreaking as he croons about his beloved. Speaking of unconventional wedding songs, I like this one a lot too. This song is about a couple who knows each other – enough that he can imagine her as a wife and mother. And he knows her enough to know her weaknesses.
But I think I know you, I know you
You can break
I think I know you, I know you
I watch and I wait
“Break” can have a lot of connotations. It could mean that his lover is fragile and delicate, that she will easily break under pressure, or it means that she has a breaking point – and he’s worried that she’s close to it. Is he a burden for her to love? Is he going to be the one to break her?
You’re porcelain
You’re porcelain
I just want to hold you
You’re porcelain
It’s natural to want to protect someone from the world, especially when they’ve been hurt before. I used to wear my wounds on my sleeve in the hope that some big strong man might protect me from the pain again (spoiler alert: it doesn’t work that way.)
The greatest gift I imagine is in loving myself
Without fear of you walking away
All this is enough but I know you
I know you
You can break
I think I know you, I know you
I watch and I wait
Wait, that doesn’t sound very healthy. Is the only reason he’s with her is because she puts up with his…crap? And doesn’t do anything about it? I mean, I’ve been there, but that kind of mentality doesn’t make for a lasting relationship. And I think he knows that.
It’s hard to face a life alone
With you I never will
I believe in you, beautiful
A million times around
You used to say, it’d be okay
And it will
You’d better love me til the day you’re gone
XO until the day you’re gone
Like I’ve talked about before, you’re willing to make allowances for people’s vices if you love them enough. That’s why people put up with crap. And this couple seems like they have a good handle on who the other is. Despite the flaws, despite the hurt, they love each other. It sounds like they’ve had some pitfalls, but they’ve made it, and now it’s “XO until the day you’re gone.”
Everybody breaks at some point. Once they do, everything is different. The point is if you’re able to love that person afterward. If you can, then you know you truly love them. But if you’re able to easily abandon them, that’s not love. My friends and I have stood up for each other through every breaking point. It doesn’t mean we don’t call each other out on our crap, but we love each other through it, too.
Because everyone’s made of porcelain. Everyone could break. It’s all in how you put them back together.
Audrey D. DeBoer 